Coffee and Calypso
by Lady Bladesong
Summary: Seven years after the events of Love is a Battlefield, Paige and Alex find each other again. But everything has changed. Problem is, everything’s also remained the same. What kind of relationship can come from that?
1. Power Under Pressure

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige In The Future**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Power Under Pressure

She remembered exploding in the office. She remembered her opportunistic second leaping to the fore as her mind retreated and her body burst out of the building. She remembered the walking in those impossible shoes. She remembered being unable to breathe. She did not remember the cozy warmth of this coffee shop. She didn't remember ordering anything. Now she sat numbly, trying to piece together the fragments of recent memory broken by her own weakness.

Before Paige Michalchuck was a steaming beverage. Around her were the usual coffeehouse types. The trendy business people on their laptops or meeting, the students downing espresso as if drinking it that much faster would help the absorption of information, there was a hobo in the corner, and all those belonged in the almost-but-not-quite-cramped space except for Paige, who felt a far ways away from her uptown office. Now remembering to breathe, Paige kept her panic down as she carefully surveyed her surroundings and evaluated her situation. No purse. No phone. No clues. Not touching the drink on the table, Paige found herself just watching people. She could tell you exactly how much each coffeehouse patron's outfit had cost. She could tell that some were happy, and some were not. Some were in love. She could have told those how to dress to better attract their intended mate. She could tell them how to more effectively broadcast the message they wanted to send. But she wouldn't tell them that sometimes fashion doesn't matter. You don't think those sorts of things in her business, much less say them. Slowly people drained out of the shop, taking with them some of the warmth that kept Paige feeling safe. Why hadn't she left? She could go, get her bearings, find a way back to her penthouse apartment or to the office. She hadn't touched the drink, although something was vaguely familiar about it. The whole place held a vague familiarity, although she had never been to that coffeehouse in her life. 

Someone approached, though Paige did not look in that direction at first. "What's wrong? I thought you always ordered no-whip." And she was a memory, shifted through time to a point that Paige was unable to recognize. Hair swept up messily in a way that was familiar, but the eyes that looked at her over that distinctive nose were unreadable and almost dead as opposed to the fiery openness Paige's true memories held. Breaking her gaze from Paige, the memory looked at the drink. "Nothing for it now. It's too cold and reheating those things just fucks with the flavor." The memory took the drink from the table and walked away from Paige.

Paige awoke with a start in her office, carefully annotated notes were on her desk, detailing what had gone on after Paige had "checked out" as Mick liked to refer to Paige's episodes.

"I need some coffee." Paige said after a long moment, and left the office.


	2. Morning Pick Me Up

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex's dreams cause some introspection.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Morning Pick-Me-Up

Jeanette was up before Alex was, a coffee pot brewing by the time Alex padded out to the tiny kitchen, a giant shirt pulled over her lithe body.

"You had a bad dream, huh? You kicked me. A lot." Alex gave a little half nod as she poured herself a cup.

"...Sorry." Alex said, still tired.

"Such plaintive sincerity!" Jeanette mocked, attempting to hug Alex who stiffened and moved away from those words. "What's wrong babe? Do you want to talk about it."

"No," Alex said firmly, but she stared at her coffee and sighed. "But I should." Concerned, Jeanette decided to bring Alex over to the couch. Taking the hispanic girl by the shoulders, Jeanette gently led her girlfriend to the living room, letting Alex sit herself down. 

"Okay lil missy. Let's hear it."

Alex looked uncomfortable for half a moment before speaking. "Do you remember when I told you about Paige?"

Jeanette frowned, ruffling her short hair remembering. "Cheerleader fashion bitch who kicked you out and left you to rot?"

Alex sighed again. "That's not exactly how it happened." 

"Lexi...okay. You were screwed up. Any girl who couldn't notice how purely SAD you were at that time is a blind idiot who didn't deserve your time of day." Jeanette tried to move closer to Alex to comfort her, but Alex pushed her away.

"Just let me talk okay!!!" Alex yelled. Surprised, Jeanette withdrew. Alex continued. "I just...I think I could have done things differently. Hell, I KNOW I could have done things differently. I mean, If I had, I wouldn't have met you or Mark, but I wouldn't have lost her either."

"Wel---" Jeanette paused as she recalled her last interruption.

"I know, I know, she was my first, we all love our firsts, blah blah fucking blah, I've heard it. But that's not what bothers me, the love that is." 

Alex looked down again, embarrassed while Jeanette flinched at hearing the word love in reference to this past girlfriend, "Then what?"

"The fact that if I saw her again, I think I'd be more inclined to hurt her than chase her."

Jeanette got up and stretched, flexed her well-built body, then looked at Alex. "What's my biggest flaw?"

Alex thought for a moment, although she didn't know where this was going. "You don't think people will take you seriously when you show your feminine side."

Jeanette actually blushed, but nodded in a sort of almost-amused manner. "And you're afraid that people will think you're a bitch if you act strongly. You've told me just about everything Lexi, and far as I can tell, when it comes to your past, you're afraid to confront it because you think you'll go too far. I don't think there is a too far. I mean as long as you don't go throttling someone..."

"I almost did." Alex put down her coffee mug and buried her head in her arms. "I almost...oh god...I was so angry...I can't believe I almost...after all that bullshit with Chad and all those other assholes...I turned out just as bad." Alex was shocked out of her muttering when Jeanette thwapped her upside the head.

"Idiot. You're not anywhere near as bad. You stopped yourself. That counts for a lot. You have to get all this 'I'm a horrible person' bullshit out of your system. Getting Paige out of your system would be nice too," Jeanette smirked "But not mandatory. I do understand you know. I'm not that butch."

Alex smiled, but still looked somewhat withdrawn. "I don't know if I should take The Den. I mean, I don't get why Mark left it to me of all people. We barely knew..."

"Jesus Mary and Joseph! Alex, seven years does not constitute 'barely knew'. You took care of him. When I couldn't..."

"You were trying to become an officer. That and he kept it from you." Jeanette took Alex's matter-of-fact tone as a good sign.

Jeanette suddenly smiled. "You see? We all have regrets. It's not what we did or didn't do in the past. It's how we treat our pasts in the present and how we let them influence our futures"

Alex rubbed her temple. Her head hurt now, but at least it wasn't her heart. "How in the world are you that wise this early in the morning?"

"Easy." Jeanette stuck her tongue out. "I've had more coffee than you."


	3. A Better Shot

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige gets a new assignment that comes with some old attachments. **

**Feedback: Please:)**

A Better Shot 

"Boss!" Mick's violent entrance and sharp bark startled Paige out of her daydream of mocha with raspberries. Realizing that she at least appeared as if she had been working, she looked pointedly at Mickey.

"Hon, this had better be good." Mickey looked at his boss a bit sheepishly.

"Um, well. Katherine would like to see you." Mick paused, then realizing what he sounded like. "In her office I mean! There's some project! Dominique's pet project I think! She wants you! For a meeting! I mean!" Mickey got more and more agitated as he continued until Paige had gotten up and walked straight past him, her heels authoritatively clicking on the ground as she walked.

Paige herself was equally worried and annoyed. Katherine rarely called Paige in for anything, and the fact that the viper of a woman, Dominique, would be there...Paige reminded herself to breathe as she entered Katherine's office. The willow-like woman was nevertheless imposing as she looked at Paige with an ever-appraising gaze. Also in the room was the voluptuous figure of the raven-haired Dominique, a smirk on her coldly beautiful face.

"Chuckie," she said saccharinely. "So good of you to join us!" Paige pointedly ignored Dominique and waited for Katherine to speak. 

"Paige. Yes. Okay dears, here's the deal. You know I've been debating which one of you to send overseas to check up on operations. I've decided that it will be Dominique." Dominique didn't have to vocalize to show her pleasure at this declaration, her whole body straightening out of it's languid pose, an almost wicked smile on her face. "Which leaves you Paige, to pick up with Dominique's main project."

_'Ah yes,'_ Paige thought, groaning inwardly. _'Project Mallrat.'_

"Of course," Paige replied outwardly. "I'd be happy to pick up Dominique's slack."

Katherine's eyebrows were continuously raising as Dominique laughed haughtily. "Chuckles, I think you'll love it. After all dealing with lower people has always been your forte hasn't it?"

"Now ladies, as Dominique is leaving within the week, I expect you to work together to make this transition of leadership a smooth one. Paige, I think you'll find your tasks simple enough. I've already approved Dominique's current plans to pick up on the upper middle coffee house crowd. All that remains right now is acquiring a venue for promotional shooting and finding some new models for the line." Without another word Katherine returned to her own paperwork, expecting the two to leave.

"Coffee shops? That's your brilliant new niche? The espresso express crowd?" Paige scoffed as she and Dominique left Katherine's office.

"You're just jealous you didn't think of it first, Chuckie, just like you're jealous of all my brilliance."

"What. Ever. Who's your art director right now? I'll have to inform him he's no longer working for a tyrannical madwoman."

"There is none," Dominique replied simply, her dark blue eyes glittering. 

"What?!?" Paige exclaimed. "How did you...?"

"They were all incompetent fools. I've been heading almost everything besides footwork as this WAS **my** only project." Dominique smirked. "I'm sure you and Mr. Mouse can figure out a good division of work." Dominique handed Paige a moderately filled file folder. This should be everything YOU need. Have fun Chuckles!" Dominique laughed as she walked away from an increasingly annoyed Paige as she skimmed through the folder's contents. She stopped immediately at an interior shot one of Dominique's photographers had gotten of an inspiration venue. It was a cozy, warmly lit cafe with carefully arranged tables and a countertop bar. The cafe was almost completely full, A lanky fey of a man was attending the cash register while someone else was making beverages.

"Oh my god," Paige breathed, "The cafe. It's her."


	4. Grand Reopening

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex's new customer reminds her of the past.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Grand Reopening

Alex looked up as Jeanette walked into The Den, shaking her head disapprovingly. "It's late. It's going to be early. Did you really have to spend the whole night fixing up?"

Alex shrugged. "I just wanted to make sure everything was still working."

Jeanette sighed, taking a seat at the bar. "Two weeks disuse does not equal broken."

"Not for coffee machines at least," Alex replied. "Robert came by and I finished up some more paperwork. He also dropped off a letter. From Mark."

"...have you read it yet?" Jeanette asked quietly.

"No. I...his will was bad enough for me." 

Jeanette put her hand on Alex's, squeezing gently. "It might help. Do you want me to?" Alex considered for a moment, and then handed the unopened document to Jeanette, who started reading.

"Dear Alex,

If you're reading this you must have decided to keep The Den. This pleases me greatly as I can't think of anyone more deserving. It can't be going into better hands. My girl, you have been a lifesaver, both literally and figuratively speaking. Which may sound somewhat ironic from a dead man, but I assure you it's true. Finding you meant more to me than you will probably ever know. Helping you helped me confront my own demons. You're probably wondering what I'm talking about, but it doesn't truly matter. May The Den bring you twice the joy and none of the sorrows it brought me.

Good luck my girl,  
Mark Edward Sherwood V

PS - Never discount your dreams."

Alex looked past Jeanette, silent for a few moments. "Crap. It's morning isn't it? I guess I'll find some time to take a nap later."

"Lexi..." Jeanette gave Alex another reassuring squeeze.

"I'll be fine Jean." Alex said, moving to wipe the counter again.

"Right. Well. Even if you don't need sleep, I do. I had a long night too."

"Where were you?" Alex asked before Jeanette got out the door.

"Rudy's."

"Knock lots of heads?"

"It wasn't as bad as all that, but the usual drunk idiots are the usual drunk idiots." Jeanette almost laughed. "I'll see you tonight though. Don't work too hard." Jeanette winked at Alex who smirked in response and left, letting the first customer of the day through.

Alex was surprised to notice the man walking up to the counter was in fact not a regular. He was a short man, who while impeccably dressed, had the look of a corporate yes-man. Lightly freckled with a boyish face, he walked up to the counter with an odd mix of arrogance and apprehension.

"Large lowfat no-whip mocha and a small dry cappuccino." Alex nodded as she rang him up and got to work, though something about the order was tickling the back of her head. While she was making the drinks, it seemed that the man was interested in conversation.

"Miss, I was wondering if you could tell me when would be a good time to speak with Mr.Sherwood concerning this establishment."

Alex glanced at him, annoyed. "What seems to be the problem?"

"Ah..." he seemed almost embarrassed. "No problem, I simply had an additional errand of speaking to Mr.Sherwood concerning a business proposition...he _is_ the owner of this establishment yes?"

Alex sighed as she capped the drinks. "No, not anymore. You have something to say, say it to me."

Now the man seemed even more nervous. "Well. It's concerning acquiring certain release and ability to use your establishment, Ms..."

"Nunez. For what?" 

"Photography mostly. I represent Calypso Inc..." Alex cut him off.

"Fashion?"

"Yes, actually." Mickey brightened at this seeming good turn.

"Take your drinks," Alex placed the two cups in a to-go tray. "And get the fuck out of my cafe. I'm not interested."

Mickey, although taken aback by the sudden hostility of Alex fished a business card from his person and laid it on the counter. "Should you change your mind."

"I won't. Have a nice day."

Mickey hurried out, chased by Alex's lingering glare, hoping the drinks hadn't cooled too much.


	5. Americano

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige mixes business with pleasure.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Americano

The dark haired woman laughed heartily. Who would have thought of all people Paige Michalchuck would be chasing her? She turned to the blonde, amused, although by now she had pegged Paige and her habits. 

"How about 'No,' Paige?" she said in mock anger. "I think you've taken advantage of me enough times." In response, Paige reached for the woman's hand in supplication.

"Please. We used to be close."

The woman snorted and shook off Paige's hand, although she now felt a little more reluctant to leave the blonde. "Paige, even when we were sleeping together we weren't close."

"That's hardly fair Rachel." In fact it was, but Paige didn't let little things like facts get in her way. By way of emphasizing her point, Paige pulled Rachel to her and kissed her, caressing the woman's bare arms. "You've always been special to me." Rachel looked away, although a half-smile graced her face. "I've made mistakes, but..." Rachael silenced Paige with another kiss, willingly letting Paige get her way before she said something so patently untrue that she wouldn't be able to forgive her.

"But you'll make them again. And I'll be hurt. And when you want something new or think you can use me for something, you'll come looking for me again. But it's okay. Because while I know that I'll only be special to you for however long you need me, you've always been special to me." Something about that declaration made Paige feel a bit guiltier than usual. "So what does the great Paige Michalchuck need from me this time?"

"Absolutely nothing." Paige said happily, much to Rachel's confusion. "I don't _need_ you for anything hon. I actually came just to offer you a job." Paige's smile sent shivers down Rachel's spine, making the woman wonder how many times she'd make deals with the devil for the sake of something masquerading as affection.

"A job?" Truth be told, even considering her financial situation, and especially considering who was offering it and how, Rachel was very loathe to have anything to do with Calypso.

"Mhmm," Paige kept herself ever close, just close enough for Rachel to be able to smell the subtle sweet perfume she always wore. "You see hon, Katherine's made me take over one of Dominique's projects and..."

"Made you, huh? And how do you think that's going to make me look? I know how glad Dominique was when I changed my name. Even gladder when I stopped trying to break into this city's fashion bubble."

"No one but payroll would know, it's a rather low-key position."

"Just how you like me right? So no one can link us. Goddess, Paige you're almost as bad as my sister."

"Oh I think I've got a couple things up on dear Dominique," Paige suggested, again touching Rachel who was still debating in her head, although they both knew what the conclusion was going to be.

"Come home with me tonight, and I'll think about it."

Paige smiled in that same damning way as before. "Why hon, I thought you'd never ask."

Several hours later as Rachel slept, Paige sent a quick text message to Mickey. "I got her."


	6. Slow Roasted

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex remembers.  
**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Slow Roasted

_7 years ago_  
One more night on a stage. Although this one was much smaller, much dirtier than Zanzibar, Alex was all too familiar with the way these things worked. Tired, but assured of her survival for a while longer, Alex made her way out of the small club and onto the street.

"Working for something. Right." As Alex walked, she could hear the telltale sounds of drunken violence, and her pace slowed, although she still advanced cautiously. She came upon three men, one of which obviously wanted very little to do with the other two, what with the bleeding face and the other two calling him a "dirty faggot". Without thinking Alex swept up a broken piece of sidewalk and hurled it at one of the aggressors.

"Ow! The hell..." The angry drunkard turned to Alex, infuriated. "The hell do you think you're doing, you crazy bitch?"

"What do **you** think you're doing?" Alex shouted, even as she was thinking_'What__**do**__ I think I'm doing?'_

"Or else what, whore?" The other sneered.

Alex didn't think anymore, she just lashed out, punching the drunk square on his solar plexus, tripping the other man who attacked her in a surprised rage. Grabbing the bloody man by the arm, she started running, fairly dragging the man through the streets.

_6 years ago_  
"Mark, I don't think you want a **stripper** working for you." The blonde man stroked his beard thoughtfully.

"True. I guess you'll just have to quit then."

"I don't exactly know a lot about coffee." Alex pointed out.

"Alex." Mark said seriously. "If there's one thing I've learned from life it's to swallow my pride and accept help when it's offered."

Alex sat very still as the urge to get up and leave right then and there overtook her. "I live too far away from The Den."

"There's a bed and shower in the back. It's not much, but it's rent-free."

"Why are you doing this?" Alex asked, incredulously.

"Because I need a new barista."

"I mean..." Mark shook his head.

"Because you helped me Alex. Because I think the world owes you through me. Because I'm trying to be a nice guy. Because you are a good person, a beautiful person even, and I wouldn't forgive myself if I just did NOTHING while someone I've grown fond of lives on the edge."

Alex looked down, shocked and embarrassed for half a moment. "Okay," she said quietly.

"Splendid!" Mark exclaimed, hugging her. "My girl, your troubles are at an end."

_5 years ago_  
"Don't I know you from somewhere?" The man leaning over the counter was unfortunately not too far off the mark, and Alex didn't want to remember exactly where he had seen her, or how much of her he had seen.

"You know her from **here** dummy. Furthermore, she's taken. Now why don't you move along?" The man took a step back as the opposing looking woman glared at him. She had at least three inches on him in height, and at least half again as much muscle. Her bright eyes balefully peeking out of her chocolate bangs.

"Right...nice...seeing you...again..." The man beat a hasty retreat, and Alex chuckled.

"Thanks Jeanette,"

"No problem," Jeanette said easily, now leaning over the counter in much the same manner the man had been, a sparkle in her eyes. "Except I don't like lying much. So how about dinner?"

"You mean other than the instant who-knows-what you usually make?" Alex said teasingly to her roommate.

"No, I mean out. You and me. Romantically. C'mon Nunez."

Alex looked sadly at Jeanette, and instantly the easy-going brawler regretted her words.

"I really, really can't Jeanette. I'm sorry."

_3 years ago_  
"Remember a couple years ago when some creep who had seen me back when I was a stripper came to The Den and almost recognized me?" Jeanette nodded and Alex went on. "That was scary. But afterward I think was even scarier for me."

"How come?" Jeanette asked between bites of her hamburger, trying her best to stay nonchalant.

"A lot of reasons. But mostly because you offer so much."

"I'm assuming you mean besides the incomprehensible financial files you helped me sort through and the nights of indigestion when I break out of the norm and try to cook." Jeanette said lightly.

"I'm trying to be serious!" Alex said laughing. "But you ruined it! What I'm trying to say genius," Alex reached out to caress Jeanette's cheek. "Is that I'd like to try."  
_  
1 year ago_  
Mark looked at Alex sadly. "I'm dying, Alex."

_Now_  
"Something wrong babe?" Jeanette asked as she came in, curling up on the couch next to Alex.

"Nothing. Just...remembering."


	7. Ristretto

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige is Surprised**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Ristretto

Paige sighed; the morning had proven to be a long one. With the addition of Rachel she had pooled the talent she wanted, but Mickey had reported some trouble with the coffee shop owners. For about the seventy-fifth time she wondered exactly what Dominique was thinking when she started the project. As usual the elevator in the parking garage was taking forever. When the elevator reached the fourth floor, the person who entered was a moderately dressed woman whose collared shirt could have used an iron. Her sleeves were rolled up past her elbow and her jeans were several seasons, if not years, old, but still fairly nice. Her hair was loose and flowing. Just the way Paige remembered liking it.

Alex pressed the button for the second floor, and since she was preoccupied with what was hopefully the last of the legal hoops Robert would have her jump through, she did not notice at first who the other person in the elevator was. When she did, Paige had not yet realized the circumstance. When the blonde did however, she tried very hard not to, as Alex stared at her unabashedly.

The elevator chimed its arrival.

Alex took a chance, and then jogged off to find her car.

Paige was left with the renewed feeling of Alex's lips against her own, frighteningly vivid against her pale memories.


	8. Scalded Milk

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: They both react**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Scalded Milk

_'Let it go,'_ Alex thought even as she drove like a madwoman, her body buzzing worse than any caffeine high, shaking, unbelieving.

_'She doesn't matter anymore,'_ As Alex arrived at the apartment she shared with the person who should matter. Jeanette was sleeping, as she often did in the middle of the day before nights that she was out helping at one club, bar, event, venue or another.

_'It's far too late'_ Alex realized as she curled up beside Jeanette, who half-awakened by Alex's loud entrance, threw an arm around her.

* * *

_'What just happened? Was that real?'_ Paige brought her fingers to her lips. They WERE tingling with the sensation of reaction to intimate contact to another's.

_'I should have known this would happen.'_ Paige glanced at the picture she had previously removed from the project files.

_'It's far too late'_ Paige started saying to herself, as she slumped in her car, attempting to cry her memories and guilt away.


	9. Reheated

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex knows better.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Reheated

"Mmmm, Lexi baby, as lovely as it is for you to join me on my nap, I _really_ need to get going soon. I'm working at Edge tonight and Jack wants me early." Jeanette paused getting up as she realized Alex was still curled up rather tightly on the bed. "Lexi? Don't you have night shift today too?" Jeanette poked Alex in the side, her ticklish spot. When she didn't get a response, she sat back down on the bed. "Alex? Is something wrong?"

"Mrrrrrfg," Alex responded, rolling away from Jeanette and cocooning herself in the sheets..

"Uh huh...something go wrong in Robert's?" 

"Nurr."

"...okay then. Well. I'm off. You better get up soon or you'll be late too."

"I kissed her!" Jeanette spun around, shocked.

"What?"

"I kissed her. Paige. I saw her in the elevator when I was done with Robert. I didn't even realize what I was doing; I'm pretty sure she knew it was me but didn't want to say anything and all I could do was stare and then the elevator...I was pretty sure I was never going to see her again anyway because who knows why she was there and I kissed her. Then ran. I'm sorry." Alex still hadn't moved, so she hadn't seen Jeanette's expression.

"Right. Paige. Just randomly pops up in an elevator and you kiss her. Wow. I'm going to go to work. Don't wait up at The Den for me." Jeanette walked out the door, leaving Alex behind with her thoughts.

_'Stupid.Stupid.Stupid.Stupid.Stupid.Stupid. What the HELL was I thinking? She looked good...no,she looked tired. Guess all that fashion crap worked out for her. Why the hell was she in that elevator? I just wanted the goodbye I didn't get before. Stupid.Stupid.Stupid.Stupid.Stupid. How can I make it up to Jeanette? Stupid Nunez keep screwing it up...gotta get to the Den, Blaine and Rita are probably wondering where I am...'_

The severely rumpled Alex rolled out of bed, making her way to the closet and finding a somewhat less rumpled shirt, changing from her light blue to black. She put her hair up because it was easier than restyling it, and walked to The Den.

Thankfully the cafe was busy, and Alex got into the time-worn routine easily, greeting regulars and calling out orders before they had been made. But always in the back of her mind was the morning, and what she insisted to herself was a temporary bout of insanity.

_'C'mon now. Seven years should have been long enough, so it's going to take a lot more than half a day to get over seeing her again, even if the chances of it happening again are close to none...I hope Jean doesn't do anything stupid. I'd never forgive myself. Hell, I can't forgive myself now. What I did was inexcusable. A, I was acting like Jeanette didn't even exist and I had been waiting seven years for that to happen. B, that's definitely got to count as some sort of assault. She could probably hunt down my coffee slinging butt and sue me...'_ Slowly Alex allowed her thoughts to dissolve, letting the rhythm of the cafe seep in.

"One hot chocolate!" Alex called out, leaving it on the pick-up counter and moving on to the next order. She had hardly started steaming the milk before Blaine was calling her over. 

"Alex, some irate woman is demanding to talk to you!"

"Hold on a second Blaine, what did you do this time?" She finished making the macchiato and brought it to the counter. "Dani! Your macchiato is ready!" Sliding it forward, she turned to Blaine. "Now what..." Alex stopped. Feeling very much like a deer, she stared for the second time that day at Paige Michalchuck.

"Alex." Paige acknowledged. "You should really pay more attention to your customers. I **always** order no-whip."

"Uh, boss?" Blaine asked nervously as Alex kept staring.

"What are you doing here?"

"Trying to get my order corrected; isn't that allowed here?" Paige smirked.

"That's not...one no-whip coming up, sorry about that ma'am." Alex took the mug and dumped it, quickly making the new hot chocolate, and handing it over. "Have a nice evening."

"Not so fast, Alex. I'm looking for the owner of this place." Paige said, with less smirk and more force.

Alex couldn't believe it, blinking through a sudden mist, though she might have expected it. Paige was just throwing on her mask as always. Business? Bull. Alex knew exactly why Paige had gone through all the effort of finding her.

"Uh, lady," Blaine interrupted, remembering that he had a spine, and that Alex had always been a good coworker, and was looking to be just as good a boss. "Alex **is** the owner of The Den. And while I realize it might just be a tad rude, you have your drink, in a to-go cup I might add. It might be a good idea, to go, as you seem to be upsetting my boss."

Paige glared at Blaine, who promptly realized there were other customers waiting to be served, and Rita could only do so much on her own. 

"What do you want, Paige?" Alex finally choked out.

"Yeah, what do you want Paige? More importantly, what do you want with **my** girlfriend?" Paige turned away from Alex to face a glaring woman whose arms, arms that reminded Paige how many yoga sessions she had skipped over seven years, were crossed, but whose fists were shaking. Almost as if by silent consensus, although the pointed looks from Blaine and Rita might have helped, the other patrons of The Den started to leave, although granted there weren't that many left.

"And who are you sweetie? Danger Dyke?" To this, Jeanette only smirked, walking up closer to Paige, whose eyes grew wider as she realized the danger she was in.

"Let's get one thing straight honey. I don't take kindly to people coming here for seemingly the sole purpose of upsetting Alex. I think she's been through enough thanks to you." 

"Jean. Don't. Please." Alex pleaded. Jeanette glanced at Alex coldly.

"...fine. Let me just remind you Alex that this," Jeanette glanced at Paige. "Has caused you enough trouble. Whatever. I'm out of here. Don't wait for me tonight." Jeanette stalked away. Alex watched her, horrified, while Paige looked on with a raised eyebrow.

"Well **that** was interesting." Paige said after a moment, leaning in close to Alex, whose brain was still processing what had happened. "This is for this morning," Paige kissed Alex lightly, lingering with all the promise that Alex had wanted seven years ago, with none of the desperation that she still felt. "And this, is my real reason for coming. A business proposal that obviously Mickey couldn't push, silly boy." Paige placed a small folio on the counter and left, leaving Alex.

"Um...boss?" Blaine and Rita looked at Alex questioningly, but Alex just took the folio and went into the back room, slamming the door behind her.


	10. Pressed

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige needs something.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Pressed

Rachel looked up from her drafting table as she heard the door open. She thanked her luck when it was Paige and not some other crazy woman. She went back to work.

"You're lucky I hadn't changed my lock," she said without looking back up. "I try to do that between women."

"Sorry."

Rachel wasn't sure if she heard that right.

"Do you want a drink or something?" Rachel asked as she finished a sketch, finally putting her mind away from work and looking at Paige, who at 9 o'clock looked pretty tired for someone who usually stayed up working till the wee hours.

"Water would be great hon, thanks." Rachel nodded, and went to her kitchenette to get two glasses of water. When she came back, she found Paige looking at her sketches. "What are these?"

"Well Paige," Rachel smiled. "You may very well be my sexiest client, but you're definitely not my only client." Paige bit her lower lip and nodded.

"They're amazing." Rachel grinned, genuinely pleased, but still wondering what was going on.

"Well, I would hope so." Rachel simply sat there, watching Paige very delicately look through the sketches.

"Rachel, do you, or did you, love me?" Rachel choked on her water.

"Paige, are you okay? You come into my apartment uninvited, but instead of yelling at me, assaulting me, or trying to get me into bed with you, you're quiet, polite, acknowledging the existence of my talent, AND, for the first time ever, mind you, you say the l-word. Are you okay? Is this something I should be concerned about?"

"Just...answer, please?" Rachel was taken aback by this side of Paige, one she had never seen before.

"No." Rachel smiled sadly. "I could have, I think, once. Before all that trouble with Domi, before you stabbed me in the back, twice, before Jason, before all the drama. Yeah. I could have loved you. You were fun, sexy, smart. There's not much to dislike about you Paige, besides the fact that you don't LET people love you. You make it so damn hard for us to."

Paige remembered all too clearly, laughing bitterly. "I'm a bitch."

"Dear, you are the QUEEN bitch." Rachel reached out, caressing Paige's face, which she realized was close to tears. "But I'm still here."

"But why?"

"Paige. Honey. You need to get yourself together," Rachel dragged Paige into the bedroom, keeping herself from laughing at the blonde's protests. "Now, I realize this may be new to you, but I've got an idea. Get out of the bitch suit, and stay here with me. Think, talk if you want, I promise I'll try to listen. Try to figure out what got you here. And then," Rachel kissed Paige's nose. "You can sleep. And rest. And go from there. No pressure. No worries. No romantic antics...unless that's what you want of course." Rachel finished jokingly.

Paige hugged Rachel tightly, an embrace neither of the women were used to.

Reassured, Paige undressed unhurriedly, burying herself in the large bed (a bed she had incidentally bought for Rachel; it was the most luxurious object in the apartment). Rachel soon followed, finding Paige's hand and holding on.

Reminding herself to breathe, Paige remembered.

_  
"What the fuck do you think I am Paige?" Rachel started hurriedly grabbing her things. "If you want me, fine, want me, but don't play me like this." Rachel left in a huff, shoving past the handsome man with roses in his hand._

_--- _

_"Were you ever a model yourself Miss Michalchuck?" He was handsome, rugged, but still beautiful._

_"Never."_

_--- _

_"Liar! You lying, manipulative, toxic..." Rachel couldn't finish as Paige kissed her fiercely, dragging the hurt and angry girl deeper into her apartment._

_"I never lied to you hon." The soothing caress was shaken off. "I never promised anything." The kiss wasn't. "I tried." An errant breath. A deliberate nibble. "Forgive me?"_

_--- _

_"This is unacceptable," Paige said coldly. "Get out."_

_"Unacceptable? Paige, this isn't business ; this is about us, you know, the relationship we sort of maybe have?"_

_"I believe I said get out. Don't make me call security."_

_"Whatever happened to caring?"_

_--- _

_"Care? Chuckles, let me spell this out for you. I don't like you. Katherine thinks you're useful, and I'll have to admit, she might just be right. But you, are NOT the sort of person I want anywhere near my little sister. If you cared one ounce about her, you'd cut it off now before it got ugly." Before Paige could reply, Dominique changed tactics. "You either end it, or not only will I tell Rachel about your little trysts with our male models, but I'll PERSONALLY see to it that Katherine finds out about EVERY little dirty trick you pulled to get here."_

_"You don't have anything on me, Dominique." Paige sneered._

_"No? You are so wrong honey, because I, have everything."_

_--- _

_"Everything?" He smiled at her incredulous, but intrigued. "What kind of fashion is that?"_

_"The kind I help you wear." Paige replied with a smirk, helping him with that last button. "It's a long-lasting sort of thing."_

_--- _

_Katherine shook Paige's hand, satisfied. "You'll never be happier you left dabenshire. I think you'll find your work at Calypso much more up your alley Ms. Michalchuck."_

_--- _

_"Michalchuck! How stupid could you be, you dumb cow!" Paige wondered if the sacrifice had been worth it._

_--- _

_"It was a LIE Paige! Alex doesn't have any family in Ajax!"_

_"So she lied. She's Alex. I'm sure she's fine." Paige said after a moment of shock she didn't let touch her. "Now get out of this house before I call the police."_

_"The hell?!? I can't BELIEVE you." Jay started pacing back and forth, frustrated. "She LOVED you, though only God knows why. She lost everything! You took her in, and she said everything was fine, and then two weeks later she started calling me up more and more. She was so lost...now granted I was a mess too at the time, what with Mel...that was all my fault...and then you kick her out? I hadn't even heard from her after that one time we lit up here. And now she's missing and you don't even care?!?"_

_"Of course I care!" Paige screamed at him. "But what am I supposed to do? What was I supposed to do? She was going to ruin everything! She didn't care about getting her life together."_

_"So you just cut her off like dead weight? She was trying! But you didn't even care. Even that goddamn fag friend of yours made things worse. And I thought he and Alex were FRIENDS. Hell, apparently I was stupid enough to believe when she said you loved her and you two were happy, so maybe that was a lie too."_

_Paige looked away from the angry man. "Jay. Get out. Now."_

_Jay glared at her, silently daring her to look at him. "Fine. You're cold Michalchuck. I hope you burn in hell."_

_After Jay left, Paige collapsed on the ground and started to cry._

_--- _

_Crying herself to sleep in an empty bed._

_--- _

_"Awfully fond of the bed, aren't you Alex?" Paige teased._

_"Well, it __**is**__ where I usually see you."_

_--- _

_"You ever going to tell her that you love her?"  
_

Rachel watched Paige fall into a restless slumber. "You women should come with warning labels, I swear..." she muttered, getting up to find a different blanket. "Blanket hog."


	11. Decaffeinated

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Jeanette comes to some conclusions. Alex would like one.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Decaffeinated

Alex didn't expect Jeanette to be outside the door as she opened up for the morning.

"Hey," Jeanette said. "I thought I was supposed to be the one who didn't go home."

"I didn't think you'd want me in your apartment." Alex replied flatly.

"Oi you, last time I checked you pay half the rent and utilities. That makes it your apartment too." Jeanette followed Alex as the tired-looking woman went back into the Den. Quickly and discreetly, Jeanette turned the sign back to "Closed" and locked the front door. "Alex? Can you just talk to me?" 

"What do you want me to say, Jean?" Alex turned around. "I'm a mess! Things are a mess! And it's all because of me again."

"Because you kissed her, right? Are you ever REALLY going to explain that?"

"It was supposed to be a goodbye that I didn't get before...but it turned into a hello."

"What?"

"When Paige kicked me out, we hadn't said the things that needed to be said. At least I didn't. I didn't even say goodbye properly. I just...left. And I let Paige keep convincing herself that she was in the right. Not that she wasn't partially. I spent the first couple weeks being too proud to even want to speak to her. Then I just kept moving further and further from her, and I realized I hadn't said goodbye. I had intended to, you know, come back stronger, just so I could say goodbye properly. But I never did. When I saw her in that elevator, I couldn't tell if she had recognized me or not. And I thought 'This is my chance'. I could get a proper goodbye. A last memory. But it's a mess now, isn't it?" Jeanette, leaning against a wall, just looked thoughtful.

"I love you, Alex. I don't know if I say that enough. I was instantly attracted when I saw you here six years ago, and as you and I got closer, I knew it. I love you. And I get the distinct impression that you love me too. That's good enough for me, now that I'm done being a jealous idiot. But...I don't think you're done with Paige. If you were, you wouldn't have kissed her. Maybe you would have said hello or something...goodbye maybe, if you were feeling ironic. I don't want you to spend the rest of your life regretting a screwed up goodbye. You should...deal with that."

"Jean... " Alex trailed. "I'm sorry."

"Nah, don't be." Jeanette smiled. "I'll be waiting for you."

"Um...so when do you want my stuff out of the apartment?" Alex asked sheepishly. 

"No need. I've taken a roadie job for a band. I guess they need some muscle to move equipment and what not. I'll be gone for a couple of months at least." Jeanette's casual attitude seemed forced to Alex.

"You don't have to do this," Alex said.

"No, but I want to." Jeanette kept up her carefree face. "Just promise me you'll be careful. I don't want a real reason to want to punch Paige."'

"You wouldn't." Alex said.

"I would. If she hurts you, that's more than enough reason for me to want to punch her..." Jeanette paused, realizing how somber Alex still seemed. "C'mon missy, I'm not saying goodbye just yet. I'll be back before you know it. Then maybe I'll have my favorite woman in the whole world back again, eh?" Jeanette hugged Alex tightly. "Do what you need to," she said, still hugging Alex. "I trust you." Jeanette blew a kiss as she reopened the Den and left Alex with her thoughts.

Alex knew better, but she still felt like she had been abandoned again.


	12. Upside Down Macchiato

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Rachel causes some drama, and Paige gets a deal.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Upside-down Macchiato

Rachel walked down the street, quite pleased with herself. Her last painting commissions were through, and she could focus on her newest job, working with the new Calypso label. For once, things were looking up. Paige was being...well, she had been decidedly un-Paige-like, but Rachel had already decided that the change wasn't unwelcome. In fact, Paige was coming over that night for dinner, something she had never done before. As Rachel passed a small coffee shop, she looked in the window, reminded of her new project. She wasn't expecting to be reminded of other things as well. Hesitating for only a moment, she quickly entered.

"A bit early in the round to be cheating on me, isn't it Paige?" Paige was startled to see Rachel's livid face. Ignoring Alex's furrowed brow, she attempted to explain herself to Rachel.

"Hon, this isn't what you think."

"Paige, I'm not an idiot. Although I must be to have thought you could change. That was a real nice act Tuesday night, by the way. I actually believed you. But here you are, again. But wait, you did change!" Rachel added sarcastically. "At least this time it's a woman." Rachel looked at Alex, and sneered. "Confused dear? Let me make things clear. Paige is in these things for the sex." She paused for half a moment, glancing at Paige darkly. "She's trying to make herself feel."

Paige responded before Alex did.

"Actually hon, I'm TRYING to finalize a business deal. But thank you for embarrassing me and yourself. If you don't mind, I'd like to attempt to salvage this, so if you could leave, that'd be great."

Rachel looked down at the table. There were two mugs filled halfway, but there were also quite a lot of paperwork.

"...Right...I'll see you tonight then."

"Confidence suits you better than jealousy hon." Paige said, almost endearingly.

Rachel left, now both sure and unsure. Still hurt, but more embarrassed. She was even relieved. Maybe Paige HAD changed.

Paige bit her lip after Rachel left, looking away.

"...real sweet girl." Alex said finally, almost amused.

"The bitch you just experienced is usually a little...though not much...less of a bitch."

"Sounds like a match made in heaven," Alex retorted. Paige bit back an immediate response.

"So...now that you know EXACTLY what's involved in this venture, what do you say?"

"Yes...and no. I don't see a problem with the photography...the money's right. But I'm not allowing any advertising."

"Alex, you have twenty gazillion advertisements on your bulletin board."

"That's different. That's all community stuff. I'm not budging Paige." Paige sighed, resigned.

"I'll see what I can work out. I'll call you if and when I get the proper contracts drawn up." 

Alex looked at her watch. "Now that that's done...what now Paige?"

Paige hesitated. "Alex...I moved on." 

Alex seemed annoyed. "And I haven't?"

"Well, I sort of remember you kissing me in an elevator."

"For the record you kissed me back. Here. A lot more than I kissed you." 

"I was being, as Rachel would say, the queen bitch." Alex smiled at that.

"How long have you two been together?"

"On and off for a while now." Paige said offhandedly. "We're the sort that always try at being serious, but fail...or rather, I fail." Paige was starting to surprise herself with her honesty.

"You did have trouble keeping your word." Alex said, suddenly bitter. "Did you tell her 'You have me' as well?"

"...Alex, I'm sorry. I regret what I did back then more than anything else I've ever done."

"You're sorry? Do you even know what you DID Paige?"

"I abandoned you. Because you challenged me, and I was scared." Paige said this more calmly, although she was starting to feel an all-too familiar tightness in her chest.

"I loved you. Did you ever realize that? And after my mother went back to Chad...you were all I had. And then I had nothing. Do you know what it's like Paige? For the only people who matter to you to decide you don't?"

"If I could take it back, I would." Paige said, again, much more honest than she intended. "You must hate me."

"Sometimes." Alex said.

"...only sometimes?"

"I don't want to be someone who hates people." Alex said. "Not even you." She shifted in her seat, almost uncomfortably. "I want...I want to get to know you...again, assuming I did at some point."

"What about what's-her-name...Jeanette?" Paige asked incredulously.

"What about Rachel? In any case Paige, I'm not asking for anything more than a second chance at friendship. We're both different people...seeing different people. But you can never have too many friends, eh?"

"Friends..." Paige repeated, agreeing, hopeful, crushed, and relieved.


	13. French Roast

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex is observant, but she fails to realize a few things**

**Feedback: Please:)**

French Roast

Alex didn't realize how much Paige had changed, and how much she had remained the same.

In some ways, she was the same queen bee of seven plus years ago, full of arrogance and walking with a self-assured strut. But there were also very real breathless flashes of the unsure Paige who didn't know where things were going, but didn't want to be left behind...and didn't want anyone to know she felt that way.

She had the same self-conscious habits, including those habits developed to cover the self-conscious habits. 

Alex told herself that she was just being observant.

She became an irregular nighttime fixture at The Den, even after the contracts had already been drawn up and Alex had posted which two days they would be closed to the public. She stuck out like a sore thumb in her office attire, at least three worlds of style away from Alex's usual patrons. Alex wondered exactly what Paige's company was up to trying to reach people like Dani, whose requirement for clothing was that it was black and not worn more than three days in a row.

Paige did always have a lot of paperwork with her, and was never far from her phone or laptop, so Alex assumed she wasn't doing anything she wouldn't be normally doing anywhere else.

One night, Paige had stayed longer than usual, a bit past closing, Alex hadn't noticed until she started wiping tables.

"Don't you have someone to go home to, Ms Executive?" Alex teased, pausing at Paige's table.

Paige didn't respond immediately, frowning at her screen, apparently attempting her patented Paige glare to fix it, and Alex nudged her a bit.

"Paige?" The blonde looked up, startled.

"Hmn? Oh! Alex, I was...sometimes the people I work with are beyond intolerable." Paige closed her laptop. "Sorry, I'll be out in a minute hon."

Alex laughed. "I'm not chasing you out with a broomstick."

"Hey Alex!" Alex turned to see Rita putting on her coat. "Finished cleaning up the back; I'm heading out, yeah?" The short redhead didn't wait for Alex to wave her off.

Paige cocked her head at Alex, who's eyes followed the blonde's following Rita out. "She usually does that?

Alex felt herself laughing again. "I think she's just pleased I'm here so often, Mark usually took early mornings, not late nights. She's been around the place longer than me...she just doesn't really get close. Out as soon as she can, every shift." Mentioning Mark made Alex remember, and she wasn't ready for that memory; she sat down across from Paige. "You however, I have to tell to leave."

"Yeah, well...not every night." Paige reasoned, still twirling a pen in her hand.

"What's Rachel think about that?" Alex asked, remembering her first meeting with the angry artist.

"Rachel...knows how I am when I'm stuck on a project." Paige answered.

"Yeah, she does seem to know you pretty well." Alex said. "Once burned twice shy, eh? But I guess any more than that just pisses a girl off."

Paige looked honestly embarrassed. "I guess so."

"Who are you?" Alex asked. Paige looked at her confused "Seven years ago I thought I knew you, and you proved me wrong. So now who are you?"

"I guess you'll just have to find out Alex. That's not exactly a question I can answer with words." Paige seemed ready, to bolt any second now, but Alex reached out and held her hand.

"Paige?" Paige shook her off, then gestured grandly.

"You've got a good life here Alex. You seem genuinely happy. You're surrounded by people who like you. I'm surrounded by people who'd cut my proverbial throat as soon as look at me. And we all pretend to adore each other." Paige looked haunted. "I forgot you until the elevator. You know how I did?"

"Paige..." Alex shook her head. She wanted, she NEEDED for this to stop before something happened they would both regret.

"I forgot at the bottom of every glass. In the bed of any person who made a pretense of wanting me."

Alex didn't want to hear this.

"I forgot why I was forgetting. And pushed away the few people who did more than just pretend to care." Paige looked into Alex's eyes, as if searching. Alex tried to figure out what would be the most graceful escape route out of this conversation, seven years too late, but several days, weeks, too early. "I'm sorry," Paige sighed out, defeated by whatever she found in Alex's eyes. "You don't want to hear this."

"Problem with that statement Paige. I want to be able to help if I can. We helped each other before, even before we were dating."

"...Somehow diverting the attention of evil bosses and doing history homework isn't exactly on the same level." That annoyed Alex; there had always been more to their friendship than that. "Besides...you REALLY don't want to hear this." Paige tried to go again, but Alex stopped her again.

"What don't you want to tell me?" Alex asked, now unable to let go even though everything in her was screaming that she would regret what came next.

"I loved you too." Paige said almost too quietly for Alex to hear. Almost.

"You..." Alex couldn't respond immediately, because Paige was kissing her. Again, that same kiss of want, of regret. It was a mouth pleading for the past. A thousand memories ran through Alex's head.

Paige wasn't in any of them.

But she held on anyway, let the kiss deepen anyway, because even though she knew you couldn't kiss love out of your system, she thought maybe it could heal this one wound.

Alex never realized how much she had changed.

But some things always remained the same.


	14. Doubleshot

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige is trying  
**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Doubleshot

Upon thinking about it, Rachel decided she should thank this woman, whoever she was. And it was a woman, she knew. Paige didn't get worked up about men like she did about women, at least not the men that Rachel knew about. This woman was in Paige's kisses, in her caresses, in her enthusiasm, in her hesitation, in her honesty, and in her affection. Rachel knew this, knew it wasn't herself that caused this turnaround in Paige. But it was she who was reaping the rewards.

Paige had come to her that night in a way that Rachel was used to from times before, all passion and need, but the desperation was something new, as well as the gentleness.

When she found Paige in her kitchen the next morning, she was flabbergasted.

"You...cook?" she had managed dumbly.

"It's an old hobby," Paige replied shyly. "Waffles?"

"Sure. Time to throw out that pesky diet anyway." Rachel smiled, deciding she could get used to this, but knowing that she shouldn't.

Paige knew she was delaying the inevitable, or maybe she was just saving her own skin again. Maybe she was trying to prove something, but to who she wasn't sure.

_Alex had pulled away as Paige attempted to pull their bodies closer together._

_"I can't," she had said, although Paige was sure that Alex had been talking more to herself._

_"Alex..." More than anything else, Paige felt embarrassed, and a bit ashamed._

_"I'm sorry Paige, I thought you understood. I can't..." she hesitated. "I just can't." she finished. "Please, just go."_

_"As you wish hon." And Paige retreated back to something she knew very well._

After several nights of realizing Paige was crying herself to sleep, Rachel made a decision. She woke up earlier than Paige, making herself some coffee to steel herself.

When Paige made her way to Rachel's kitchen, she wasn't ready for that sad smile.

"She worth all this Paige?" she asked.

Paige stopped in her tracks, confirming Rachel's suspicions. "What?"

"Who is it?" Rachel pressed. "What woman has the power to turn Paige Michalchuck into the almost-perfect girlfriend?" Rachel shook her head. "Who broke you Paige?"

"I'm not..." Paige started, but Rachel interrupted her.

"Broken? Of course you are. You just were different before because you had accepted it. What are you trying to do now? Fix it?

"It's not something a person just **fixes**" Paige said. Rachel only nodded.

"Right. So who is she? The one woman who told you no? Did she just not want you, or did she wise up and leave you?"

"Rachel. Just. Stop. You're acting. Like a jilted lover." Rachel didn't notice the halting way Paige spoke,

"That's what I am usually."

"Well not this time! I'm here! With you! Isn't that enough" Paige fairly screamed. Then the blonde was clutching her chest, obviously having a hard time breathing.

"Oh shit...Paige?" Rachel rushed to catch Paige, who almost fell over. "Paige!"


	15. Costa Rica Tarrazú

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex doesn't know who she's dealing with.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Costa Rica Tarrazú

Alex seriously considered picking up the phone and simply throwing at the wall so it would leave her in peace. It was entirely too early to consider conversation. However, she answered the infernal ringing machine anyway.

"Hello?"

"If it isn't sleeping beauty?" Jeanette's voice answered. Alex immediately sat up. "How's my favorite girl doing?"

"Jean!" Alex felt herself smile. "I've missed you." The beat of silence on Jeanette's end was noticed by Alex immediately.

"Have you?"

_'How could she ask that?'_

"Jean...it's not like that, I promise." Alex wondered for a moment exactly what it was like.

"What is it like, then Alex? I know I'm the one who left but I didn't really have a choice."

"You could have stayed. You don't want to deal with this anymore than I do." Alex accused.

"Yeah, but it's not my past. I would never make you deal with my past if it reappeared. You can't expect me to deal with yours without wanting to...to...just answer something for me Alex?"

"Yeah?" Alex already knew what Jeanette was going to ask.

"Do you love her?"

"No." Alex said automatically. "I don't."

_'I can't.'_

"...right. A couple shows on the tour got canceled. I'll probably be home a bit sooner than we both thought. Be careful Alex. Bye."

"I love you." Alex said, though she wasn't sure if Jean had heard it or not.

* * *

Alex sighed, watching the swarm of people in her cafe. _'Alright, so maybe it's not a swarm...but they ARE pests.'_

The hot bright lights they had brought in didn't help her irritability.

She watched a dark haired woman systematically turn off bright lights, snap a photo, then turn them back on, moving away before the rest of the staff could realize what was going on.

"Hey you, just standing there!" The woman called to Alex. "Come over here and help me with something would you?" Alex shook her head in astonishment, but went over to the photographer anyway.

"Alright, just sit here, would you? Damn models aren't going to be here till tomorrow, but how am I supposed to...oh." Rachel stopped ranting when she recognized Alex. "Shit. I'm sorry, if you want I can..."

"It's fine," Alex said, almost amused. "I should be apologizing to you, really. I'm sorry if I caused trouble between you and Paige." Rachel seemed surprised by this.

"It's no trouble I'm not used to. But then if you know Paige you already know that..." Rachel's eyes suddenly narrowed. "How do you know Paige, anyway?"

"Oh we went to high school together...if you're going to be taking my photograph, can I ask what you're using it for?"

"High school huh? Shit, I bet she was a bitch back then too." Rachel laughed. "Although...she is better now." she added, mostly to herself. "The picture is just so I can get an idea of body. Paige is still out scouring for 'average' models. Right. You own the place right? So it seems a good place to start. Sit like you're waiting for your order or something." Alex tried a pose, and Rachel quickly took the shot. "Photography's really not my thing. For one I hate these lights. But when it comes to my work, I actually like doing it all myself...thanks a lot...you know, I never caught your name."

"Alex," Alex held out her hand, and Rachel shook it firmly, although Alex noticed she had her head cocked in a thoughtful manner.

"Nice to meet you on better terms." The woman smiled. "I have other things to get done now though. Thank you for the help."

"You're welcome," Alex replied, watching Rachel put her camera away and pull out a sketchbook and a pencil from her bag, walking around the Den, muttering.

* * *

Rachel watched Alex yell at some men for going to the back near her equipment. "Alex...huh. So that's her." 


	16. Iced Americano

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige is forced to confront the truth.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Iced Americano

Rachel watched Paige every spare moment of the next day, noticing how the blonde purposely went out of her way to avoid Alex, even as it seemed at some points the raven-haired cafe owner sought her out. This seemed to only confirm the artist's theory. Alex HAD to be the cause of Paige's almost metamorphosis. She wasn't exactly sure why, though. Sure, Alex was a beautiful woman, but so had been plenty of Paige's other conquests. Rachel decided that she probably wasn't going to figure it out immediately, so she simply watched.

Alex presided over what went on in her cafe with a critical eye. She didn't let any metal equipment with edges on her tables; she didn't let anyone go behind the counter, although some complained that limited their shots. She didn't accommodate the models. In fact, Alex seemed quite irritated with the whole circus of affairs. This made Rachel wonder why Alex was letting any of it go on at all. Of course she was being paid, but surely it had to be more than that. Finding Mickey, she had asked him about the woman, and he had replied that Alex had been very vehement about not allowing any of this on her property. Then all of a sudden she changed her mind. This, to Rachel, was very suspicious.

When the day finally ended, Rachel found Paige easily, sneaking up behind her. "Hey Paigey."

Paige, turned around, shocked, a hopeful expression on her face that instantly turned back to the Paige Rachel knew.

"Hey yourself hon. Give me a minute will you? I need to finish chasing our crews out of here before Alex has a fit." Rachel watched Paige almost literally do exactly that, shooting Alex a smile the cafe owner did her best not to notice. Rachel watched all this in her own thoughtful way.

When they had gotten to Paige's apartment, the blonde collapsed onto her sofa with a fitful sigh.

"I'm EXHAUSTED. But at least things are going smoothly. Are they on your end?" Paige was of course referring to the just-out-of-art-school-working-for-dirt-cheap designers she had hired to work under Rachel. Rachel laughed, sitting beside Paige.

"Oh, they're a bit trying, but you know me, I don't deal with bullshit for long." Paige wasn't too tired to catch the meaning behind that.

"I'm sorry. For the other night. And the night before that come to think of it. In fact," Rachel hushed Paige with a finger to her lips.

"Any more apologies from you, Paige, and I'll have to make sure the apocalypse isn't on the horizon." Rachel looked at Paige seriously. "You scared me that night though; I don't think you've ever done that around me before." Paige looked embarrassed.

"Well, they don't happen often. I'm..."

"No!" Rachel quickly interrupted, almost laughing. Almost. "I was so scared I almost forgot what we were...discussing, to begin with."

"Rachel..." Paige tried her best to distract Rachel from the conversation at hand, but for once, Rachel wasn't going to be put off.

"It's that cafe owner, isn't it?" she asked quietly. Paige bit her lip, then nodded, looking away.

"I'm..." Rachel pressed on before she heard more apologies whose sincerity she still questioned.

"You love her, don't you?" To this, Paige didn't answer immediately.

"I did, once, but then I screwed it up."

"And you hadn't seen her since then?"

"No."

"Wow..." Rachel looked at Paige as if seeing her for the first time, which in a sense, she was. This was not the Paige she had first gotten to know. Rachel didn't know what to think of that. The Paige she had first met, she had fallen instantly in lust with, knowing it would never grow into anything more, letting herself get swept away in those rising and crashing tides of Paige's affection. This Paige, she was starting to fall for, but she was afraid she had already lost her to someone else. "You know Paige, I think you're lying," Rachel noted the panicked look on Paige's face. "Maybe you don't realize you are, but I think you are all the same. I think you do still love that woman."

"Rachel, I want to make this, make US work." Paige said, holding onto the other woman's hand firmly.

"Why Paige? So you can prove to yourself, and to Alex, that you're not the person you turned into?" Rachel shook her head. "That's still using me. And I know you know I don't mind, as long as we're clear about these things."

"I'm not trying to use you!" Paige protested. Rachel nodded.

"I know Paigey. And being with you, yeah, maybe that's enough, but all the same...I don't know what you did to that woman, but I do know you're going to have to make it right sooner or later." Rachel kissed Paige gently before getting up. "You know you were the most intoxicating woman I ever met once. Now you're the woman that maybe I'd like to love. But maybe someone else has a better claim to that than me. Best of luck to you Paige." Rachel walked to let herself out, blowing Paige one last kiss before leaving.


	17. Espresso Con Panna Part One

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex isn't sure, or maybe she is.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

Espresso Con Panna Part One

_Alex,  
We should really talk about what happened the other night. Come over for dinner?  
-Paige_

Alex knew better at this point than to be surprised that Paige had her e-mail. But she wondered if accepting was such a wise idea. All this time they had been meeting either at the Den or at some neutral place. Alex didn't know how comfortable she would be at Paige's apartment. Nevertheless, she replied with an affirmative and got the details.

Finding herself at Paige's door, she wondered if it was too late to back out.

Paige opened the door wearing an outfit surprisingly low-fashion, but still somehow Paige. The pink button up and tight black pants accented Paige's womanly figure quite well. Alex felt a little odd in her old standby hoodie and jeans. Paige greeted Alex with a long embrace, which only made Alex feel more uncomfortable, though she fought it down. The apartment was everything she expected from Paige, and she saw that Paige hadn't lost her cooking talent. The meal prepared was simple, but elegantly executed. The two fell into simple conversation, and Alex found herself admitting that she was enjoying herself. But the other night wasn't far from her mind. She remembered the guilt afterwards...and the lies. It was the lies that hurt her most.

"I don't think my coffee will be anywhere near as good as yours," Paige apologized as the two finished their meals.

"But it couldn't be bad," Alex replied. Amused by Paige's refusal to let her in the kitchen, she waited on Paige's luxurious sofa. She was surprised when she heard the blade of a grinder, the smell of the beans reaching her nose. Quietly, she peeked into Paige's kitchen, and was amused to see not only the mess indicative of the meal's preparations, but Paige's top-of-the-line coffeemaker. The resulting cups of coffee were well-bodied and flavorful.

The two women sat on Paige's sofa in silence, enjoying the hot beverages.

Finally, Paige said, "I'm not sorry." Alex looked at her, knowing what she referring to, and was about to answer when her cell phone rang.

"I...should get that." Alex said apologetically. "Hello?" The other end of the line sounded like a whole crowd was there.

"How goes things babe?" Jeanette asked cheerfully. Alex felt keenly as if she had been caught.

"Pretty well," she answered. "It's noisy over there, a show about to start?"

"Yeah, I just wanted to check in. It's quiet over there; you're not at the Den?"

"No...I just finished eating dinner." That telltale beat of silence revealed to Alex what Jeanette's next words would be about.

"Paige there?" Alex, despite the truth of the assumption, was more than a bit annoyed.

"Jean! Why do you keep doing this?"

"Because I feel the need to. Can you give me the same answer that you did before?" Alex could hear people calling Jean in the background.

"Yes, I can. I love you." The noise got worse, but Alex could still hear the heavy sigh.

"That doesn't mean you don't love her."

"Well I don't." Alex said firmly, even though her eyes went to Paige's.

"Right," Now Alex could barely hear Jeanette. "I have to go now...We'll talk later. Bye Alex."

Alex looked at her phone for several seconds, silently thankful that Paige was keeping quiet.

"Here's my problem," Alex said quietly. "I still kind of love you."


	18. Espresso Con Panna Part Two

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Alex gives in.**

**Feedback: Please:)**

**Note: Those not interested in reading 18+ content, stop at the horizontal line. I promise you the story will make sense without it.**

Espresso Con Panna Part Two

Paige was silent, watching Alex, hoping maybe she'd elaborate on those words. Words she had been hoping for. Finally. "Kind of?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah. Kind of. I shouldn't, but I can't help myself. So I kind of love you." Alex looked at Paige with an honesty the blonde wasn't sure if she was ready for. "You meant everything to me once."

"Once?" Paige echoed, still unable to formulate a response, all her emotions running high.

"Yeah, once. Before you broke me."

"Funny that," Paige said. "Someone told me that I was the one who was broken. I think I broke both of us...Paige looked at Alex, who was not the Alex who loved her in high school, not the Alex who helped her through her flame out, not HER Alex anymore. But she was still Alex. "But I think I still kind of love you too." Paige was more than a little surprised and hurt when Alex snorted at this.

"Paige, you never loved me to begin with...or if you did, you never told me."

"I did!" Paige protested. "Plenty of times!" To this, Alex laughed, out loud, a sort of bitter laugh that was unfamiliar to Paige's ears.

"That doesn't exactly count Paige. You never said it...for real."

"It doesn't change the fact that I did. Do." Paige said stubbornly.

"Doesn't change the fact that you hurt me?"

"And seven years later you're declaring your love for me...kind of. I'm an evil bitch and you're a hopeless romantic."

"Hopeless?" Alex's eyes narrowed. "See. This is where the 'kind of' comes in." Alex shook her head. "I think I should go." Alex got up to leave, but Paige stopped her.

"Please. Don't."

"Make up your mind," Alex said softly. "I don't think I can take much more of this."

Paige thought for a moment looking at Alex up and down, noticing the tension wound in every inch of Alex, then asked, "What do you want to do Alex?"

"I don't think you want to know Paige."

"Do it." Paige said softly.

"I think it just might ruin everything."

"Do it anyway," Paige said, finding herself close to tears. "Maybe we need to be ruined again."

"Are you sure?" Alex asked.

"Yes."

"Okay then."

Alex pushed Paige down onto the sofa and kissed her.

* * *

Paige felt as if the floor had fallen out from under her, even as she was pressed against the plush cushions. Alex had managed to maneuver one of her legs between Paige's own, making the blonde squirm against the sometimes pressure there. Still kissing Paige fiercely,her mouth nipping at Paige's, Alex's hand caressed Paige's face, then ran along her neck, tracing the trail soon followed by her tongue as Alex pulled away from the kiss she had started.

Paige clutched Alex as if she was clinging for her life; in a way she was. But then Alex found Paige's hands, pulling them away from herself. Freeing herself from Paige's grasp, Alex made her way lower on Paige, kissing her way down the path unbuttoned by her hand. When she had unbuttoned the last button, she kissed her way back up Paige's body, eventually removing the shirt completely. With skilled fingers, Alex unclasped the lacey bra restraining Paige's breasts, the next moment freeing Paige of the garment completely.

Alex paused, staring into Paige's eyes. Paige looked up at Alex, feeling more exposed in that gaze than if she had been fully nude.

"Alex..."

Alex bent down to kiss Paige again, this time letting her tongue caress the blonde's as her hands massaged Paige's breasts. This time she didn't stop Paige's hands as they clung to her back, then started tugging, eventually pulling off Alex's hoodie, which was the only point at which Alex had paused, allowing Paige's divestment of her upper body, her own bra soon following the hoodie. Alex's eyes watched Paige's, as the blonde took in the sight of Alex.

The blonde tried to rise up to Alex, but Alex pushed her down again, this time taking nipples between fingers, tweaking them gently as her tongue flickered against Paige's neck, elicting gasps from the blonde, accented by occasional pressings of that teasing leg against Paige's center.

"A-alex..." Paige managed, as Alex shifted herself downward, her left hand replaced by a soft mouth, the errant hand dancing ever downwards, tracing the top of Paige's pants.

Alex's hands stopped their movements, a finger paused at the top button of the pants, a hand softly cupping Paige's right breast. Her tongue traced the side of the left once. Alex glanced at Paige, the blonde's crystal eyes shining into Alex's own amber orbs. A moment of understanding passed between the two, a silent agreement that somehow Alex knew wouldn't be kept, but she liked the pretense of it all the same.

Alex slowly unbuttoned Paige's pants, then using both hands, slowly pulled off both the pants and the minimal garment underneath off of Paige's body, rising almost completely off the sofa to do so. As Alex leaned down again, a hand traced up Paige's right leg, tracing circles as it approached higher on her thigh, Alex's tongue flitting against the heated skin of Paige's torso. Alex felt Paige's hands sliding through her hair, those fingertips caressing her head and neck as gently as Alex's along Paige's more sensitive surfaces. The fingers of one hand sliding against moist folds, the other underneath Paige's bottom, squeezing that roundness gently but repeatedly, the motion almost becoming a kneading.

Slowly, almost reverently a finger entered Paige, who welcomed it with a soft almost-moan, the almost being lost as just as gently a second joined it. As Alex's fingers found a steady rhythm, Alex's eyes met Paige's again, although the blonde's did not stay open for very long intervals as the sensations washed over her, her body arching up against Alex.

When Alex's thumb found Paige's clit, the blonde's closed eyes Alex knew this time to not be avoidance, but acceptance, of want.

As Alex slowly worked Paige's body to its peak, her eyes roamed Paige's body, changed but familiar. How easily, she realized, she had fallen into old patterns.

Paige crested, arching, Alex's name again on her lips, an only half-believed declaration swiftly kissed away even as Alex played the blonde down gently, caressing aftershocks and shudders to greater intensity before letting them fade away completely.

As Paige gathered the scattered remnants of her thoughts, she was vaguely aware of Alex somehow fitting with her, lying there together with her on that sofa turned suture.


	19. Cappuccino

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Two steps forward, one and a half steps back.**

**Feedback: Please? Maybe I'll update faster:)**

Cappuccino

Alex woke up to the smell of coffee, familiar and reassuring. She bolted up quickly as she realized she was on a sofa. She had never owned a sofa, always having been around a couch sort of environment. Then she noticed she wasn't wearing half her clothes. And then there was Paige, sipping a cup of coffee and looking at Alex quietly.

"You kicked me off the sofa," Paige said, handing Alex a cup. "Nightmare?"

Alex looked at the coffee, then to Paige. The maybe-mistake of last night flashing in her head, Jeanette's face in her mind a reminder of all the reasons why and why not.

"Maybe." Alex's eyes took in her surroundings, as if they had somehow changed from the night before; seeing her hoodie on the floor she scooped it up, then put it on. "So what about you?" she asked, remembering Paige's fatal question.

"What?"

"What do you want to do?" Alex asked Paige, smiling oddly, remembering the sorts of things Paige liked to do.

"I guess...it's sort of ruined now." The blonde replied.

Alex nodded, remembering that she had warned Paige of that. "So now that I've ruined your plans again, are you going to throw me out?"

"How can you say that?" Paige asked, genuinely shocked.

"Because we were ruined before last night. And this," Alex waved her coffee cup around. "Only fixes part of it."

"What are you talking about?" Paige asked.

"Knowing you won't keep your promises." Paige just looked at Alex sadly.

"I haven't even said anything yet."

_'I know. I'm trying to stop you.'_

"You don't have to. I already know how this goes. You want to make things better. But Paige, this doesn't get better."

"It can. It could."

_'A lot of things COULD happen. Like you breaking my heart again.'_

"It got as better as it's going to get," Alex said resolutely. "It's funny what you find when you go looking...I didn't know you've slept with a couple of the Den's regulars...I thought they were staring because of your clothes."

_'Until Jane told me otherwise, asking me how I could be friends with you.'_

"My past is my past," Paige said. "I'm trying to move forward."

"Then what is this Paige?" Alex asked, even though somehow she had already figured it out. "What is this trying this...whatever this is, with your ex?"

"You started it," Paige said, sounding almsot appropriately juvenile. 

"And I've finished it," Alex said, getting up, but Paige, in that way of one desperately clinging, grabbed on to her. 

"No. Just listen, please." Alex paused standing, there in that room where she'd never be able to look at that sofa without remembering trying to stitch a wound back together. "I love you. That's three and one kind of times that I've said it for real."

_'Four. I only pretended to not hear you that one time.'_

"And I've hurt you, and I know that I'm not perfect, but I'm trying something I haven't tried in a long time Alex. I'm trying to be honest. I love you."

_'You've said that already.'_

"And I'll never be able to take back the things I've done to you, or anyone else, but this is more than me trying to stick a bandage on the problem. I'm not trying to fix the past."

_'Good, because it'd be a bit late for that.' _

"I'm trying to make a present, and maybe a future."

"Don't I get a say in that?" Alex asked sarcastically. "I have a present, had maybe, I don't know. And my future was looking pretty darn good before I walked in that elevator."

_'Then it looked like you.'_

"I loved you. I kind of still do, because I'm never going to love anyone the way I love you." And she hoped this would be true, that she would never again love so selflessly, selfless, because when they were together she felt the borders in between them blur, losing herself in Paige. "The past...it'll always be there. There were good times in there, and maybe I should have left well enough alone."

"I understand." Paige said softly, but then she pulled the suddenly all too pliant Alex into a kiss. "But I don't care."

Alex's response was a simple arched eyebrow, her cooling gaze holding Paige's eyes. She couldn't let herself go again. Paige's pleading last night had been the last time.

"I don't care, because now that I do understand, I know why it seems I never break out of my circles. I'm going back to you. It's always been you. Always. I've never loved anyone, and been loved back the way you loved me. Out of everyone, it was only you. Always you."

Alex wondered briefly if that was true. She had her memories. Good memories and bitter ones, perhaps changed with the lens of age, but she still remembered. She had all her memories of Paige, and all the time-worn and washed emotions that went with them. But then she also had memories, both sweet and sour, with all the promise of a love honestly shared. Up until the point she started to lie. And she knew that's what caused the silence, and the accusations, and the hurt.

"Paige, did you recognize me in that elevator?"

"...yes."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"You scared me. The idea of you scared me." It was honest, and Alex appreciated that.

"I'm scared too. I'm scared I'm going to make a mistake. A worse one than last night might have been." Paige flinched at that. "I thought, I think, I loved, love, I'm not sure any more, but I thought I was, with Jeanette, but I couldn't be honest with her, because of you." Alex sighed, remembering. "You made me want to be a better person Paige, but then you also sneak into all the the dark parts of me."

"And you become a worse person trying to get back at me." Paige finished. Alex looked at her surprised. "Me too." Paige took Alex's hands in her own. "Can't we just try one more time?"

Alex, sadder than ever, shook her head.

"I can't."


	20. Shade Grown

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Some Dragons Slay Themselves**

**Feedback: Please? **

Shade Grown

_A month and a half later..._  
Rachel looked at Paige, trying to find something in the blonde's face that simply wasn't there.

"Paige," she said, snapping her fingers in front of Paige's face to get her attention.

"Hmn?" Paige looked at Rachel blankly.

"I know you and I have very, very, different methods of coping. But it's been almost two months."

"I'm sorry." Paige said, turning away, then rolling, curling up in the covers.

Rachel said nothing, and did nothing at first, but then she snuggled up against Paige gently running her hands through Paige's hair soothingly. "Me too."

* * *

The turning of the lock, as quiet as it was, stirred Alex out of her thoughts. Jeanette entered with her duffel bag swung over her shoulder, surprised to see Alex there.

"Psychic much?" the woman smirked.

"I couldn't sleep," Alex said. "I've been, well quite honestly I've been restless, and as you may not have noticed, the apartment is perhaps for the first time virtually spotless...but I'm still restless." Alex hugged Jeanette. "Welcome back."

The first thing Jeanette noticed about Alex had been the way her eyes had lit up on her.

The second was the deep shadows in those same eyes.

"I think you're right you know. Nothing's really changed from when you left. I'm still...conflicted."

"Well. Now I'm here."

"I know, and I'm thankful for my knight in shining biker boots." Alex said smiling now with her mouth as well as her eyes as she looked at the taller woman fondly. "But I don't know if a Paige dragon is one that's supposed to be slain."

Jeanette was amazed, as she almost always was concerning Alex, good or bad. She took Alex's hand, and finally let her eyes meet Alex's straight on, no longer quite so concerned that the words and the woman were mismatched.

And then they heard a very insistent knock on the door.

The knocking on the door was unexpected, more unwelcome at that hour, at that moment. Jeanette answered it with a to-be-expected tired and annoyed gaze. The face before her was unfamiliar, matching her own gaze in weariness, jaw set in that same stolid determination to be heard as Jeanette's was to turn her away. They stood there for several minutes, Jean debating exactly how rude it was to answer the rudeness of the interruption with a closed door, before Alex peeked around the experienced doorway-blocker.

"Rachel?" Alex had not expected, and could not have guessed why this woman was at her door.

"Alex! Thank god, I was worried for a moment that I had the wrong apartment. Rachel wormed her way past Jeanette, grasping Alex's shoulders. "Really sorry to interrupt...whatever I interrupted. But you have GOT to help me with Paige."

Jeanette got over her shock quickly enough when she heard that name, turning to reevaluate the invader.

"Paige?"

"What's wrong with Paige?" Alex asked, managing to sound both concerned and cautious.

"Well. To be honest with you, it's not too out of the ordinary. But it's been going on for a while longer than I'm comfortable with, and the only person I could think of who could make a dent in this is you, so..."

"What's wrong with Paige?" Alex asked again.

"She's in my apartment, pretty drunk on my liquor. It's what she's been doing on and off when she's dealing with your...well I wouldn't know what to call what you two have," she said almost thoughtfully. "Mind explaining it?"

"It could be love," Alex said softly. "Only it never quite makes it. One of us always turns away."

Rachel looked almost amused. "That was deja vous, only you're sober I'm assuming. Look," she looked first at Alex, then at Jeanette, who was carefully watching both of them, refusing to say anything just yet. "She won't leave. I don't want to call the police. She's worse tonight than she's been in a while. Crying and saying things that really aren't for my ears. I think someone besides me should take a shot at getting her out before she decides to do something really stupid and call up an old boyfriend."

Jeanette answered for Alex. "Let's go."

Jeanette and Alex followed Rachel in Alex's car, as Jeanette's truck would have been a bit cramped with the addition of Paige. When they arrived at the artist's apartment, Alex quickly sought out Paige, quietly tugging away the bottle of liquor from the blonde, as Jeanette consulted Rachel on the location of Paige's apartment while helping the other woman gather Paige's belongings.

Jeanette drove, Alex sitting in the back with Paige who had instantly become very quiet upon noticing the two of them in Rachel's apartment. Jeanette helped Alex bring Paige and her things into the blonde's apartment, though Alex alone was the one who guided Paige to her bedroom. When Alex emerged from Paige's bedroom to the waiting Jeanette, the former ruffian suddenly wished she had had at least one stiff drink herself.

Alex seemed hesitant.

"Jean I really think..."

"You should stay I think. It would be foolish to leave her alone."

"I can think of a dozen reasons why I shouldn't." Alex said.

"I can think of at least one that says you should. It would be the right thing to do."

Alex nodded. "It would be the right thing to do." Alex followed Jeanette to the front door.

"Call me when you're sure the dragon isn't going to burn herself." Jeanette leaned in to kiss Alex goodbye. She had aimed for her cheek, but Alex offered her lips. The kiss tasted like a maybe. One Jeanette could live with.

Jeanette walked back to Alex's car and drove. She was leaving Alex to Paige again, but at least this time she figured Alex was a bit more honest.


	21. Black Coffee

**Title: Coffee and Calypso**

**Author: LadyBladesong**

**Summary: Paige wakes up.**

**Feedback: Please? I came back from the dead, didn't I?**

Black Coffee

Alex didn't let herself feel too guilty about searching Paige's closets for an additional blanket. Having disconnected and hidden all the phones, she knew it would be perfectly possible for Paige to just waltz out of her apartment, but Alex doubted she would. Settling down on the familiar sofa, Alex let the darkness of sleep rather than her thoughts take her.

Paige woke up rather early in the morning, her head pounding with the familiar painful beat that she chased to run away from a more painful beat of a different organ. She did not remember how she had gotten back to her own apartment. She shook her painful head and headed into the bathroom. Knowing how the bathroom light would only cause her more pain, she stumbled in the darkness, groping the sink for a moment. Finally however, she decided to brave the pain and as she squinted, adjusting to the light, she was surprised to find a large glass of water and a note taped up to the mirror: *Drink all the water in the glass. If you leave, you should probably take the bottle by the door with you.*

The handwriting was a neat cursive that once had always brought a small smile, or at least a smirk, to the blonde's face. Now she simply stared at it dumbly. It wasn't signed, but it didn't need to be. Paige drank all the water, then left the bathroom. Peeking around the corner to the main room of her apartment, Paige was a little bit surprised to find a slumbering Alex on her sofa.

But she was no longer asleep.

She sat up and looked at Paige with surprisingly clear eyes for a person newly awake.

"Hi Paige."

"Good Morning Alex." Paige replied nervously, deciding to sit on the sofa beside Alex's feet. They retreated as Alex brought her legs up, eyes looking at Paige over her knees.

"That remains to be seen...so why'd you do it?" The voice asked behind those knees.

"Do what?" Paige asked, resenting a bit the accusation that she sensed.

"Drink half a bottle of scotch. Ensconce yourself in Rachel's apartment. Not return any of my calls. Not fight. Give up." Alex shook her head, but uncurled a little, meeting Paige's hesitant gaze with a mouth shaped like sarcasm. "Pick one."

"I wanted to forget you for a while."

"Ah." Alex nodded. "Did it help?"

"I think you should leave." Paige said suddenly, realizing that no it hadn't helped, none of it had, from the end of the restarted relationship seven years ago to the abortive affair almost two months ago. She was still someone who had trouble breathing. Living.

"I disagree with you, but okay." Alex got up. "Are you fit to make me a couple promises?"

"Yes." Paige wondered at how small she felt.

"Good. Don't do anything stupid. And call me."

"I promise. I'm sorry, Alex."

Alex's head tilted to the side, and Paige could barely hold the girl's gaze in her own, still feeling unsteady. As Paige's gaze slid to the floor, a finger was at her chin, propping her face up. The soft kiss was unexpected, not unwelcome, both warming and chilling at the same time. It was a reminder. Alex pulled back and looked at Paige with warmer eyes.

"I'm glad you're awake now."

Paige wasn't sure if she was or not.


End file.
